Legal hurdles to same-sex marriage are falling across the country, but how do same-sex Jewish couples handle the Jewish legal marriage document, the ketubah, which traditionally lays out a man’s obligations to his wife? I asked Aliza Boyer, a Brooklyn-based ketubah artist whose clients increasingly include same-sex couples. She shares this:
In my experience thus far, same-sex couples gravitate to texts such as Rabbi Gordon Tucker’s Egalitarian Text, Rachel Adler’s Brit Ahuvim text, or any other text wherein the language is inherently more egalitarian, less gender-specific in nature–which in general tends to be more contemporary, less traditional texts. Even to the heterosexual couples I work with who express interest in less gender-specific and/or more egalitarian wording, I always suggest taking a look at the same-sex texts I offer because they are inherently moreso. Also, as far as I’m concerned and in my own practice, any text can be changed to read Bride/Bride or Daughter/Daughter, Groom/Groom or Son/Son, Partner and Partner, or anything else with which a couple–same-sex or otherwise–feels most comfortable. That being said, I do hope that new texts continue to be written especially for same-sex weddings.
A big thanks to Aliza for also sharing the photo above of a ketubah for two brides.
(Photo: Aliza Boyer, Ketubah Graphia)